Putting on the Armour of God

I just got home from church today. I'm so confused. I'm so convicted.I'm in so much pain. I know in my heart, I have sinned.My heart is so unrepentant! I have asked forgiveness to my God many times and all the time i've done something unpleasant in His eyes but i still keep on doing what he wants me to put a full stop! I feel so bad! I am such a bad daughter.How can i give away my heart and my convictions without thinking . How can i be so unwise! How can i exchange my eternal joy to a temporary happiness. How can I put my destiny and purpose at stake. How can i ever let the enemy take a foothold on me!


I'm so glad i went to church today.I feel blessed with the message. The pastor is doing a series of the book of Ephesians. It talks about ' Putting the Armour of God' everyday and every moment of your life. This epistle is a call to "walk in victory", with a charge to stand strong in the power of the Lord's might. To be able to withstand the wiles of the devil and spiritual hosts of wickedness in heavenly places, Christians needs to adorn themselves with the whole armor of God. This armor includes such elements as truth, righteousness, the gospel, faith, salvation, and the Word of God. Standing strong also requires fervent and watchful prayer, not just for one's self, but for all Christians.


My mind is set on one thing now, TO OBEY MY DAD, MY GOD. TO DELIGHT MY SELF IN HIM AND TO SERVE HIM WITH ALL OF ME. Today, i made my decision to follow him for the rest of my life.To give up my heart and hearts desires.Indeed,there are higher stakes in all of these than mere desires.

Silent cry

it pains me to see you with her
it pains me to see you happy with her.
it pains me to see you talking to her.
it pains me to see you at ease with her.


it hurts when i see you both laugh
it hurts when i see you look at her.
it hurts when i see you approach her.
it hurts when i see you both talking in the foyer.


i don't know what to do.
to smile or cry.
to hide or run away.
to pretend i'm not affected.


i don't know what to say.
to say yes or no.
to talk or keep my silence.
to ignore what they say.


it hurts to know that she can make you smile.
it hurts to know that she can make you happy.
it hurts to know that she can speak your language.
it hurts to know that she can share your passion.


it pains me because i know it is wrong to feel this way.
it pains me because i know i can't make you love me.
it pains me because i know there can never be us.
it pains me because i know there are too many walls between us.

Many things I love about you

it is lovely seeing you today.
it is lovely seeing you smile.
it is lovely hearing your voice.
it is lovely hearing you laugh.


i love the way you look at me.
i love the way you look away.
i love the way you close your eyes.
i love the way you gaze at me.


i love the way you serve me.
i love the way you care for me.
i love the way you touch me.
i love the way you thank me.


i love the way you support me.
i love the way you listen to me.
i love it when you don't know what to say.
i love it when you steal a glance and look away.


i love it when you say you're lonely.
i love it when you say you're tired.
i love it when you say nobody cares.
i love it when you say you're scared.


i love it when you speak your strange accent.
i love it when you share your corny jokes.
i love it when you share your dreams.
i love it when you share boring things.


it is lovely meeting you today.
it is lovely talking to you.
it is lovely watching you.
it is lovely having you.

Because of you

because of you i learned how to love.
because of you i learned how to open my heart.
because of you i learned how to be patient.
because of you i learned how to wait.


because of you i learned what's right from wrong.
because of you i learned how to be strong.
because of you i learned that there's no perfect man.
because of you i learned that i am no pedestal.


because of you i learned how to understand.
because of you i learned how to fight.
because of you i learned how to support.
because of you i learned how to comfort.


because of you i learned how to be a woman.
because of you i learned how to control my emotions.
because of you i learned how to be vulnerable.
because of you i learned to be still.

Goodbye my love

how can you say goodbye to someone you love.
how can you say goodbye to someone you care.
how can you say goodbye to someone so sweet.
how can you say goodbye to someone you'll miss.


how can i turn my back on you.
how can i move on without you.
how can i let you go completely.
how can i go without looking back.


i know this season is ending.
i know my mission is almost done.
i know i should have the courage to step out.
i know i should let you go.


goodbye my darling.
goodbye my friend.
goodbye my sweet.
goodbye my love.

Wishful thinking

the sight of you makes me smile.
the sight of you creates unexplainable feelings.
the sight of you makes me want to lose control.
the sight of you creates dreams of our future.


how i long to be with you everyday.
how i long to talk to you the whole day.
how i long to be your true friend until the end.
how i long to be your lover who understands.


i want to kiss away your pain.
i want to caress your face when you're tired.
i want to hug you so tenderly.
i want to wake up with you beside me.


i hope you love me as much as i love you.
i hope you miss me when i'm not around.
i hope our future will be revealed.
i hope this time will come.

My Beloved

i am your child.
i am your bride.
i am your princess.
i am your dearest.


You are my Dad.
You are my Love.
You are my King.
You are my sweetest.


i am created in Your likeness.
i am saved by Your grace.
i have a destiny to fulfill.
i have the greatest love story to tell.


Your love comforts me.
Your love changes me.
Your love has forgiven me.
Your love has set me free.


i will wait for You.
i will persevere.
i will endure.
i will finish the race.



"For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life." John 3:16

The heartcry of a child to her Father

i'm fading.
i'm drifting.
i'm sliding.
i'm falling.


will you pull me?
will you save me?
will you hold me?
will you catch me?


i'm struggling.
i'm compromising.
i'm stuck.
i'm lost.


help me to trust You.
help me to obey You.
please pull me out.
please show me the way.


“The Lord reached down from above and took hold of me; He pulled me out of the deep waters” Psalm 18:16

Come to me

i can see your loneliness.
i can feel your pain.
i can see your doubt.
i can feel your despair.


i want to reach out to you.
i want to ease your pain.
i want you to know the truth.
i want you to see hope.


i can see you're lost.
i can see you're wandering.
i can feel your regret.
i can feel your uncertainty.


i want you be in my world.
i want you to find your purpose.
i want you know that your years will be redeemed.
i want you to be secure of who you are.

i want you to know that there is ONE who heals.
I want you to know that there is ONE who forgives.
i want you know that HE loves you.
i want you to know that HE is waiting for you.

"Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest." Matt 11:28

A declaration

will you stay with me?
will you guide me?
will you hold me?
will you love me?


i will be here.
i will comfort you.
i will be your strength.
i will be your friend.


will you laugh with me?
will you walk with me?
will you hold my hand?
will you kiss my head?


i will laugh with you.
i will walk with you.
i will hold your hand.
i will kiss your head.


i will be you friend.
i will be your confidante.
i will be your number one fan.
i will be your cheerleader.
i will be yours forever.

i wish

i wish you're here.
i wish you're there.
i wish you're mine.
i wish you're in line.


i wish i can say what i want to say.
i wish i can look at you the way i want to.
i wish i can hold you without hesitation.
i wish i can love you with conviction.


i wish you can say what you want to say.
i wish you can look at me with honesty.
i wish you can hold me endlessly.
i wish you can love me unconditionally.


i wish we share the same passion.
i wish you are where i am.
i wish we walk in the same direction.
i wish you love Him more than you love me.
i wish you're the one.

Last chance

you sought me.
you looked at me.
you talked to me.
you followed me.
you run after me.


i hide from you.
i looked away.
i kept my silence.
i kept myself busy.
i run away.


you stop seeking.
you stop looking.
you stop following.
you stop talking.
you stop running.


i wondered why.
i miss you.
my heart is aching for you.
i saw you with her.
my heart longs for you.


i realized...
i'm in love with you.
is it too late?
can you love me again?
i'm in so much pain.


one afternoon
i took a chance.
i saw hope.
you said you will come.
i saw you from a far.
i took my last chance.


you held my hand.
you placed your arms
on my shoulder.
i looked at you.
you smiled at me.
you looked at me.
i touched your arms.


i took a chance.
our story begun.

The battle of the mind and heart

----------------
Now playing: MYMP - MYMP - Waiting In Vain
via FoxyTunes

everytime i see you ...

my heart leaps with happiness. i love you. my all is yours.
my mind is telling me to stop. don't be hasty. be careful. he will just hurt you.
my heart is telling me to love you without hesitations.
my mind is telling me to never listen to my heart because it is deceitful.
my heart is telling me to take a chance with you.
my mind is telling me to be weary giving my heart away.


my heart sees the goodness of your heart.
my mind sees the folly within.
my heart sees the child in you.
my mind sees your immaturity.
my heart sees the beauty of your being.
my mind sees a lost man.


my heart says he loves you.
my mind says he doesn't.
my heart says he is happy to be with you.
my mind says he is just fond of you.
my heart says he is waiting for you.
my mind says he is waiting for someone else.


when will this end?
the battle of the mind and heart.
who will win?
my mind? or my heart?


" The heart is deceitful above all things, and it is exceedingly corrupt: who can know it?" Jeremiah 17:9

hey bloggers! it's been long time that i have not visited this site . check out the ads i posted below the page. by the way u can use my search engine at the end of the page. thanks! have fun and Godbless U!

That One Special Night

My darling, can u still remember
the first glance
the first talk
the first walk?

I was so nervous, you were so shy
we talked in the cold night,
there was just you and i.


The only sound that we heard
was the gentle breeze,
soft music that rhythms
the pounding of our hearts.


Slowly i turned my head,
to see your face,
i was lost
i coudn't say anything...
i could feel your
body trembling
i could hear your
heart pounding
your faint voice that
squeezed my heart.


i want to touch your face
ease the pain in your eyes
hold you in my arms
and tell you " i love you,
i can't live without you."


i want to freeze that moment
savor each second
i wanna be lost in your arms
and stay there forever.


My darling, i can still remember
your smile...
your eyes ...
that took my breath away.

one magical night
one precious moment

can you still remember?

Memories

(Ray Watson)

Standing at the graveside
of an old forgiven past
Memories are all that's left of you
Bitterness and pain
are strangers to me now
Memories are all that's left of you

Flicking through the pages
of a diary filled with fear
Memories are all that's left of you
Looking through the years
filled with tears
Now memories are all that's left of you

They can't touch me now
They can't hurt me now
Now I know the secret of love

I release myself in worship
I give it all to you
I come before your throne of love
And bare my heart to you
I will love you with the love
That you've freely given me
And my heart will never be cold
It will never be old
It will always be free

Trying to revive in me
an old forgiven part of me
Those memories that haunt a man
made new
I'm holding on to life
in Jesus Christ
Your memories that haunt a man made new
They can't touch me now
They can't hurt me now
Now I know the secret of love

I release myself in worship
I give it all to you
I come before your throne of love
And bare my heart to you
I will love you with the love
That I freely give to you
And my heart will never be cold
It will never grow old
It will always be new.

Have you ever looked back over your life and felt the pain of your past? We all have our own private memories,many and few. "The heart knows its sorrows, no stranger shares its joy." This is a very intimate and moving song about the healing of memories. i like it so much.

In My Stillness

You knock and i stand paralized

blood rushing through my veins

racing with the pounding of my heart

trying to decide if i'm really ready

to open that door and let you in...


"coming", i say

not moving, afraid of letting you go

afraid of letting you in

i need a little more time

to subdue my emotions

dismiss my anxiety ...


i know she's still in your heart

dearly holding on a future with her

so i chose to give you time to find out

without compromising myself.


i'm dying inside

tears fall endlessly

i square my shoulders

reinforce the wall around my heart

bravely deciding that anything else

would be a pleasant surprise..


i adjust my smile

remain a touch of distance

and a smidgen of nonchalance

in reserve for masking secret pain

you see, i'll smile

even if it kills me...



so, with facade intact

resolve tightly in place

i close the door

And quietly, walk away ...



Seemed eternity passes

i sat in the stillness

of the wind

patiently waiting

carefully heeding

trusting...

listening...

to the still voice

of the Spirit



i guess, that is all i could do

yes, that's the best thing for now.

Dying To Myself

thank you for letting go of me... for setting me free from the choice

I feel lonely at times, yet I am learning to praise God. He has given me so much ' life and more abundantly'. I would not trade the joy, the learning, and the experiences i have now for anything. Knowing that i am in His will is contentment that is far beyond what doing my own thing could ever bring.Although i experience pain and weakness, in this corner I work for the Lord and the Lord works on me. There are still work to be done for God, even when my health and strength fail. I will hope continually. My mouth shall tell of His righteousness. As the years years add up, His faithfullness to me multiplies and i couldn't ask for more. Still, my little wars come and go, exceedingly anxious about my heart but i fight on the front lines of desire and longings.. I pull myself away, with head lowered and heart aching for the power to believe that in giving up all these games, i will not lose a step ( as He withholds no good thing). I still hear the enemy's shouts, trying to convince me that my retreat is in vain, yet i have chosen somehow to keep silent in my world of feelings and dreams, wishes and desires, and to lay them down at the altar of God, walking away believing there are, indeed, higher stakes in all of these than mere desires.

:: I thought letting go is to stop hoping, but then I realized that it's not, we can actually still hope! But why hope in men when men fall? Our hope must be in the Lord. He alone is our Hope.

Butterfly Kisses

mychildhood

by: Bob Carlisle

There's two things I know for sure.

She was sent here from heaven,and she's daddy's little girl.

As I drop to my knees by her bed at night,

she talks to Jesus, and I close my eyes.

And I thank God for all of the joy in my life,

But most of all, for...

Butterfly kisses after bedtime prayer.

Stickin' little white flowers all up in her hair.

"Walk beside the ponydaddy, it's my first ride."

"I know the cake looks funny, daddy, but I sure tried."

Oh, with all that I've done wrong,

I must have done something right,

To deserve a hug every morning,

And butterfly kisses at night.

Wait

.

Wait, patiently wait
God is never late
Your budding plans are in Your Father's holding
And only wait His grand divine unfolding
Then wait, wait
patiently wait
trust, hopefully trust
that God will adjust
your tangled life
And from its dark concealings
will bring His will , in all its bright revealings
then trust, trust
hopefully trust
rest, peacefully rest
on your Savior's breast
breathe in His ear your sacred high ambition
and He will bring it forth in blest fruition
then rest, rest
peacefully rest.
--- mercy a. gladwin---

Daddy And His Little Girl 2

Little Girl: Hi dad!:) it's been quite awhile.. i missed You so. I am fading away these days and You saved me. Thanks for lifting me up and putting glory, peace and joy in me again. If You are pleased with me Dad, teach me Your ways so i may know You and continue to find favor with You. Let Your Beauty be seen in me. All your wonderful Passion and Purity.Refine me, mold me till Your Beauty shines in me.

"And if what was fading away came with glory , how much greater is the glory of that which lasts." 2Cor 3:11

" If we know Christ and spend time with him in prayer and in his word, it can affect our appearance." Ex 34:29-30

"We all, with unveiled face, beholding as in a mirror the glory of the Lord, are being transformed into the same image."2Cor3:18



Daddy: Where My Spirit is, there is freedom. I am making a covenant with you before all your people. I will do wonders never before done in any nation in all the world. The people you live among will see how awesome is the work that I, the Lord, will do for you. Obey what I command you today(ex.34:10-11).Don't worry and be anxious about anything, My Presence will go with you and I will give you rest. I will cause all my goodness to pass in front of you, and I will proclaim My Name, the Lord, in your presence. I will drive out nations before you and enlarge your territory and no one will covet your land. My child, be still and know that I am God.In repentance and rest is your salvation, in your quietness and trust is your strength.You have to be calm because I am your real source of strength.




Little Girl: Dad i often grow weary in life's race. driven by its hurried pace. Lead me in Your truth and teach me for You are the God of my salvation.With You , i wait all the day. Sustain me with Your strength.I need Your hands to comfort me, guide me, lead me.I need you as i die and mortify my heart everyday.How long Dad, must i wait?



Daddy: Never mind, child.. Trust Me. Blessed are you who wait for Me. Blessed are you who hunger now, for you will be satisfied. Blessed are you who weep now, for you will laugh. Rejoice and leap for joy because great is your reward in heaven. You will weep no more. How gracious I will be when you cry for help. As soon as i hear , I will answer you. I will bind up your bruises and heal your wounds.And you will sing as on the night you celebrate a Holy festival. Your heart will rejoice. My love, be joyful in hope, patient in affliction and be faithful in prayer.



Little Girl: Thank You Daddy.:)Thank You for this peace in my heart. and for the joy despite the pain and ache. But why this hope? Is it still right to hope for a love that i painfully and joyfully bury? I know that waiting on You requires my willingness to bear uncertainty, to carry with me the unanswered question. Dad, waiting silently is the hardest of all.But the things that i feel most deeply i ought to be silent about, at least until we have talk them over thoroughly with You.I will refrain, it is all i could do. I am sure it is good for me to refrain.And You want me to keep a quiet heart, to be still before You. Right Dad?I trust you Dad for i know that further revelations might come later. Tomorrow is not my business, it is Yours. letting it rest with you is the discipline for the day, and it is enough. Truly my heart waits silently for You, for You are my Tower of strength that made me stand unshaken.



Daddy: To whom much is given, from her much will be required.Do not be afraid My little child, for your Father has been pleased to give you the kingdom.I will renew your strength and you will soar on wings like eagles. You will run and not grow weary, you will walk and not be faint.Be dressed ready for service and keep your lamp burning.Shine like the stars in the universe as you hold out the Word of life.



Little girl: From mourning in the morning --- to gladness in the evening!:) what made the differnce? seeing You made all the difference. It changed my mourning into gladness, weeping into joy. Your example inspires me to follow Your steps, die to self and serve the needs of others.Thank You for giving me the bread that sustains my heart. wine that gladdens my heart and oil that makes my face shine.I will trust You and make obeying You my primary aim.I may know heartbreak and affliction but You will guard and keep me through it all.Best of all, You give me Your grace and redeems my soul. How can I help but delight in You my Lord?:)

Daddy and His Little Girl 1

LittleGirl: O love, that wilt not let me go
I rest my weary soul in Thee
I give Thee back the life i owe
That in Thine ocean depths
its flow may richer fuller be

Daddy: Have no fear for I have paid your ransom. I have called you by my Name and you are My Own.

Little Girl: Take my love _ my God, I pour at Your feet its treasure store..

Daddy: Cast all your cares on Me, for you are My charge(1Pr 5:7). Have no anxiety, but in everything make your request be made known to Me(Phil 4:6).and I bid you to put away anxious thoughts (Mt. 6:25). My child, i want your all. I want the whole way.

Little Girl: Dad, forgive me for I am clogged with wishes of my own. My desires are wrong and should be plucked out. I have to love what You command and desire what You promise through prayer and obedience.I will not offer to You whole offerings that cost me nothing, Lord here's my heart. I count everything sheer loss because all is far outweighed by the gain of knowing Christ Jesus my Lord, for whose sake i did in fact lose everything.

Daddy: If your heart is set to do My will, you don't need to fear defeat. My promise of guidance will be fully counted upon. I will teach you and guide you in the way you should go. I will keep you under My eye. Do not behave like horse or mule, unreasoning creatures whose course must be checked with bit and bridle. Many are the torments of the ungodly but the unfailing love enfolds him (her) who trusts in the Me. Rejoice in Me and be Glad ..

Little Girl: Thou shall show me the path of life and hold up my goings in Your paths that my footsteps slip not.

From a Distance

.

I sit inside myself
waiting quietly
for God . . .

i think sometimes
it is impossible
to meet
to speak
casually with him
saying "hi" "hello"
in the presence of other people
feeling sure that
my voice will crack
or i'll do something
that will embarrass us both

i suppose it will be
like always
the greeting
the not-too-long glances
the small talk
about things that really
don't matter...
guess, that is all i could do

keep a quiet heart...

be still . . .

hold on . . .

keep my distance.

Now Is not That Time

From the moment your eyes touch mine
you awaken my desire for a time
when i will be free to act
upon all that i'm feeling
but now is not that time...
for i prefer to see you
through eyes unclouded by the longings of my senses
to discover all that you are
free of the ties that can bind prematurely
and so i choose to retreat lightly
to neither awaken nor stir the flames of desire
and wait for a time when love's fire will illuminate
and not destroy... but now is not that time...

From the moment your hand touches mine
i close my eyes and pray for strength
letting feelings wash over me
that i should ignore
my flesh clinging to them for a moment
then relinquishing its hold
as my spirit gently reassures my heart
that there will be a time for languishing in love's rivers
but now is not that time...

From the moment that your spirit reaches for mine
and our silence screams louder than any words
making impetuous promises of tomorrow and lasting love
I dare to anticipate a moment when perhaps
after all is said and done we will be one
free to give to one another without any inhibitions
unfettered by torn consciences and unwise violations
perhaps there will come a time past this moment
when i will pour out my love for you and crown you with my caresses
a time when we will be sure we were created
one for the other.. totally and completely justifed and undefiled...
perhaps there will come a time past this moment
but now is not that time . . .
( copied from the book, What to do until love finds you by M.M Hammond)

Dad's little girl

Daddy and His little Girl Part 3

And we know that in all things, God works for the good of those who love Him, who have been called according to His purpose. Ro 8:28

Little Girl: How can i tell when i am being called upon to be patient and when i am being called to take action? My heart says i'm being tested.

Daddy: In all situations you must stop before you move. Not until you stop, look, and listen will you receive My guidance. Stop worrying. Stop blaming. Stop being angry. Stop being hopeless and faithless. Look for your lesson and your share of responsibilty. Then you, you must turn within and listen to the gentle, still voice of the Spirit. If your lesson is to be still / patient, you will find the strength to let go and know that My Way is always the perfect way. When you are patient enough to stop, look, and listen, asking what to do, you will always be shown how to do it. If it's My will that you should act or speak, something inside your being will stand up, move your feet, and point you in the right directon. So, My child Stop! look! listen before you act.

" Anyone who trusts in Him will never be put to shame." Ro:10:11

Little Girl: Ok Dad, i will listen carefully and i will wait on You. Please help me sit still and be quiet. To trust You. I'm just so afraid to articulate even for myself, feelings i have to get rid of. I better stick with what You're saying than what my heart is saying. Whom have i in heaven but You? and earth has nothing besides You? (Ps 73:25)

Daddy: And the Lord spoke to her, you shall have no inheritance in their land. I am Your part and I am Your inheritance ( Nu 18:20). I will betroth you in faithfulness and you will aknowledge me(Ho2:20).I will give you vigor and new strength.You will grow wings like eagles. You will run and not be weary. You will march on and never grow faint.

Little Girl: You have made known to me the path of life(Ps16:11). Hold up my goings in Your paths, that my footsteps slip not(Ps 17:5). It seemed impossible that the torrent of passion could be brought into the calm river of Your purposes. I want him but he's not mine.He is Yours. I love him but as this desires and longings are alive and active, it is no longer in my disposal anymore.My heart is full of hope and expectation of Your promises. What is man that you are mindful of him. You made him a little lower than the heavenly beings and crowned him with glory (Ps8:4-5).You made him ruler over the works of your hands.You put everything under his feet (Ps8:6). Hear my cry for mercy as i call to You for help, as i lift up my hands toward Your Most Holy Place (Ps28:2).Praise be to You my Lord, for You heard my cry for mercy(Ps28:6).You are my strength and my shield. My heart trust in You and I am helped. My heart leaps for joy and I will give thanks to You in song(Ps28:7).Into Your hands i commit my spirit. Redeem me o Lord.In will be glad and rejoice in Your love , for You saw my affliction and knew the anguish of my soul.Dad. may the words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart be pleasing in Your sight. Thank You because You delight in bringing good to me and in seeing me enjoy Your blessings. How can i help but delight in You my Sweet Dad?

Daddy: :) You always put gladness in my heart, my sweet, precious one. From the lips of children and infants you have ordained praise (Ps8:2). You will see my goodness. Wait for me, be strong and take heart. My favor for you lasts a lifetime. I am pleased when you are happy, when you prosper.Your soul is my garden.. a garden for delight and I rejoice in you. I long to be good to You, to satisfy your deepest longings with My Love. You are My Heart's delight. Wait for Me and keep My way. I will exalt you to inherit the land (Ps37:4). My sweet, Fix your eyes on the doughnut, not on the hole and share your joys with others and leave your pain, worry, trouble with Me.

LittleGirl: I'm dying slowly. Truly my heart waits silently for You. Waiting silently is the hardest thing of all. I wanted to tell him "i love you", i can't live without you". But, i need to hold my self and refrain, that is all i could do." Everything that may abide the fire, ye shall make it go through the fire". Purity comes at a high price. I'll bid him goodbye. I want my goodbye , this last goodbye be still and splendid like a forest tree. Let there be one grand look within his eyes.Then, I will go in quivering lips and burning floods of tears. Indeed, being Yours requires countless little deaths _ occasions when i have to say no to self and yes to You. My little deaths have to be died just as great ones do.I have to die in order to live. Dad, Give me faith to live by it, faith to act on it and faith to keep looking at the joyful end of it all. He loomed in every thought, every line i read in the bible or anywhere else. Just coudn't deny that.Give me understanding.Direct me in the path of Your commands and teach me Your decrees.Thank you because you're good and did good in giving him to me. So good, and did good in so long leaving him to me.You are so good and did good in taking him from me. "YOUR WILL", the reason which is thought to obviate all argument and dry all my tears. I know my sufferings are not for nothing. never.I would live for you Lord. Keep my eyes so turned toward You that the world may attract no part of me. I woke up late this morning and my devotions with dreams of him. It bothers me somewhat that he is on my mind when i ought to be praying. I am assured that loving him is part of my life now_ important as eating. But every desire that arose i offer it to You.I have to die! die! die! it's a joy waiting for You Dad. Only too well i know again these past few days, the inner weakness to return, to go back to him, but if eel that i have set my hand and to look back now would be dishonor. You know the inner part, and You know how much of me i really leave with him. How much of me have been broken. But I have to let this go. Bury in Your loving arms and let You resurrect it in Your own time.

Ask me not, for i may not speak of it. i saw it and the tears were in his eyes. >Idylls of the King>

He is no fool who gives what he cannot keep to gain what he cannot lose > jim elliot>

The trial of faith is a thing worth much more than gold..

The Lord is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit. Ps 34:18

We live by faith and not by sight.. 2Cor 5:14

... those who live should no longer live for themselves but for Him who died for them and was raised again.2Cor5:15

As we open our hearts to the the Father, we receive the light of His wisdom.

For continually, while still alive, we are being surrendered into the hands of death for Jesus' sake ...

Anyone of you who does not give up everything he has cannot be My disciple. Lk14:33


Daddy: Do not rush. trust. and keep a quiet heart. When My will crosses the will of man somebody has to die. Soon you'll understand that this is for your best.I have great confidence in you. I take great pride in you. What could be better for you than My love? The farther you move along My path, the more you must be willing to release. Things must come up in order to move out. I permitted this heartbreak for you to be shaped in My likeness. that you may learn to trust. that you may learn to obey. that you may bear fruit. that you may reach spiritual maturity. Your broken heart is an acceptable oferring to me. If you want to find your true self, if you want real life, if your heart is set on glory. many deaths must go into your reaching the measure, many letting goes. If any man will let himself be lost for My sake , he will find his tru self. Why do you let yourself be lost? Look at the acorn and trust Me. My sweet, your tears will reap with songs of joy. Waiting requires patience -- a willingness calmly to accept waht you have or have not, where you are or where you wish you were. Trust Me. Victories are won in the quiet acceptance of ordinary events.My peace will dwell in the heart prepared to wait trustfully and quietly on Me.

Little Girl: It is amazign how clear things become when i am still before You, not complaining, not insisting on quick answers only seeking to hear Your word in the stillness and to see things in Your light. you picked up the scraps and pieces and made me whole __ a whole woman again. I will be meek God. I will be meek. What was this little incident of mine by comparison with Your suffering? Your grace made my bitter water sweet. People say, i am brave but i don't see any great bravery in walking through one of the difficult experience of life. You are the One who strengthens me with the things i must face. My greatest pain is to lose him but at this time You swooped under me as a Great Bird and carried me on eagle's wings.I believe i'm steady, shining and triumphant faith will lead me out through You, into the richest experiences i have ever had. I believe that firmly. I concentrate on this, i leave the past behind and with hands outstreched to whatever lies ahead. I go straight for the goal_ my reward the honor of being called by You in Christ (Phil3:13-14).


Quietness in the presence of God, this being "all there" for Him.

I am He who will sustain you. I have made you and I will carry you. I will sustain you and I will carry you. Is46:4

I make known the end from the beginning, from ancient times, what is still to come. i say: MY purpose will stand, and I will do all that I please.

roses

Love is
patient, love is kind
it
does not envy, it does not boast
it is not proud, it is not rude
it is not self- seeking, it is not easily
angered
it keeps no record
of wrongs
Love does not
delight in evil but rejoices with the truth
it always protects, always trusts, always
hopes
always perseveres . .
. 1Cor 13

Heart's cry

Dad, I am not going to let the waiting period discourage me.

I will hang on until Your Word is manifested in my life.

I will put patience to work and keep my words in line.

Thank You.. indeed, I will receive my harvest!

Home

by: Bryan Mcknight

Thinking back when we first met
I remember what You said
You said You'd never leave me
I let go of Your hand
Built my castle in the sand
But now I'm reachin' out again
And I'm not letting go till You . . .

Hold me
Mold me
Sometimes I feel so all alone
See I gotta find my way back home
So why don't You
Shape me
Make me
Wash me whiter than the snow
I gotta find my way back home

Master, upon my knees I pray
I just want to be the clay
Put Your arms around me
Place my life in Your hands
Lord I know I'm just a man
I know You understand
This time I'm not letting go till You

Anoint me
Appoint me
Sometimes I feel so all alone
See I gotta find my way back home
So why don't You
Chastise me
Baptize me
Wash me whiter than the snow
I gotta find my way
'Cause I'm lost and alone
I've been wandering
Long enough to know

Humbly I search for You
And I'm not gonna rest till You
Choose me
Use me
Sometimes I feel so all alone
I'm on my way back home
So why don't You

Direct me
Bless me
Wash me whiter than the snow
I'm on my way back home.

I Love You

if our love is really just a story i want it to be published into a book

so that the world will read about us if our love is perhaps a fairytale

i want it to be filmed into a movie so that all children will grow up and find a love just like ours. if our love is only a dream then i dun ever want to wake up

so that i will stay with you forever and never say goodbye...

i love you i love you I love youI love youi love you

Thoughts . . .

Measure your life by loss and not by gain.
not by the wine drunk but by the wine poured forth.
For love's strength is found in love's sacrifice,
and he who suffers most has most to give.


Dad, when the prison door closes behind me, keep me trusting in You with complete and overflowing joy.
Give Your work through me great success, and even in prison make me " free indeed". It is through my trials and afflictions that God gave me fresh revelations of Himself.



A little bird i am
shut from the fields of air,
and in my cage i sit and sing
to Him who placed me there;
well pleased a prisoner to be,
because my God it pleases Thee.


My cage confines me round,
freely i cannot fly,
but though my wings are closely bound
My soul is at liberty.
For prison walls cannot control
the flight or freedom of the soul.


Do not be anxious about anything. Phil 4:6

light in darkness

I may be experiencing little sunshine these days, but the long periods of gloomy

darkness have been wisely designed for me, for perhaps a lengthy stretch of summer

weather would have made me like parched land or a barren wilderness. I have

learned to love the darkness of sorrow, for it is there i see the brightness of God's

face. My Lord knows best, and the clouds and the sun wait for His command.I've to

wait in prayer, in faith and in quiet patience. Dad have Your own way in my life.Not

my will, but Yours be done.


Blessed is the one who waits. Daniel 12:12


I don't know what to do, and i'm in great need. But I will wait until You divide the flood before me or drive back my enemies.I will wait even if you keep me here many days, for my heart is fixed on You alone, Dad.And my spirit will wait for You with full confidence that You will still be my joy and my salvation. " For you have been my refuge and strong tower against the foe." Ps 61:3 I will wait in faith and believe that even if You keep me waiting until midnight, You will come at the right time to fulfill Your vision for me.

be strong and take heart

The plans of the Lord stand firm forever, the purposes of His heart through all generations. Ps 33:11


I must be prepared to wait on God's timing. His timing is precise, for He does things "at the very time" He has set. It is not for me to know His timing --- i must wait for it. I remember abraham and sarah's waiting for the promised son.God did not told abraham the 30 weary years of waiting but only as the time was approaching, with but a few mos. left to wait did God reveal His promise. " At the appointed time next year... Sarah will have a son." Gen 18:14

Message from my Dad:

So take heart , dear child when I require you to wait. The One you wait for will not disappoint you. He will never be even five minutes behind " the appointed time". And soon " your grief will turn to joy." Jn 16:20 Oh, how joyful the soul that I bring to laughter! Then sorrow and crying flee forever, as darkness flees the dawn.

Some glorious morn-- but when? Ah, who will say?
The steepest mountain will become a plain,
And the parched land be satisfied with rain
The gates of brass all broken; iron bars
Transfigured, form a ladder to the stars
rough places plain, and crooked way all straight
For her who with patient heart ran wait
These things will be on God's appointed day
It may not be tomorrow -- yet it may.

Blessed are those who mourn.. Mt 5:4

Thank You Lord

:: my first tongue interpretation . . .


Thank You Lord for Your grace
Thank You Lord for Your peace
Thank You Lord for your love
For peace, for grace, for wisdom that You gave

Chorus
I wanna thank You Lord
I wanna thank You that You're here
I wanna thank You that You're there
I wanna thank lord because You are everywhere with me

I wanna say i love You Lord
I wanna say i love You Lord
I wanna say thank You
Because You saved me with Your grace

Thank You, Lord
Thank You Lord
Thank You Lord for Your love

heart's cry

i don't know what to say.. dunno what to feel.
i'm grateful that You're here.
There, i feel i've not been so useful..
worried that i've not been pleasing You.
terrified that i'm not doing what You want me to do.
I want more of You. I need You so.
My vessel is not yet full.I'm hungry.
I want Your love.I longed for Your touch..
Lord,fill every empty space in me.
I LOVE YOU DAD.. i can't go on without YOU.
Please hold on.. don't ever let go of me.

The only things you can truly have in life are those given from love; and Love is the only thing you can leave behind. GIVE LOVE A CHANCE!They that look for God shall not want.

Psalms 24:10

Can't Live Without You

Im not doing so good without You.
The things i've kept were the things
I guess you always understood
So how could I have been so blind for all these years?
Guess I only see the truth through all this tears
Living without You ,everything I have in this world
And all that i'll ever be will all fall down around me
I can't take another day without You
Cause I could never make it on my own
I've been waiting so long
just to hold You and be back
in Your arms where I belong
Sorry, I cant always find the words to say
but everything I ever know
gets swept away Inside Your love
As the days pass...
I saw that time is standing still for me
when You're not here..

"And the son said unto him, Father, I have sinned against heaven, and in thy sight, and am no more worthy to be called thy son. But the father said to his servants, Bring forth the best robe, and put it on him; and put a ring on his hand, and shoes on his feet....For this my son...was lost, and is found." (Luke 15:21-22, 24)

In spite of my sins, my Father has received me with open arms. He's put a robe of righteousness on my back and His signet ring on my hand. He's put the shoes of royalty on my feet. I feel unworthy of all that but my Dad hasn't based His relationship with me on my worthiness. He's based it on His love for me. I don't have to struggle to prove myself to Him. As far as He's concerned, i'm a proven success.Thank you Dad for Your great love for me.. i love you so much ..so dearly and You know that.:)

Because of You

'tis one of my favorites..:)

by:K.martin

If ever you wonder if you touched my soul, Yes, you do.. Since I met you, I`m not the same You bring life to everything I do Just the way you say hello With one touch I can`t let go Never thought I`d fall in love with you *Because of you, my life has changed Thank you for the love & the joy you bring Because of you, I feel no shame I`ll tell the world It`s because of you Sometimes I get lonely And all I gotta do is think of you You`ve captured something inside of me You make all of my dreams come true It`s not enough that you love me for me You reached inside & touched me eternally "I loveyou" best explains How I feel for you Because of you My life has changed Thank you for the love & the joy you bring Because of you,I feel no shame I`ll tell the world It`s because of you The magic in your eyes True love, I can`t deny When you hold me, I just lose control I want you to know That I`m never letting go You mean so much to me, I want theworld to see It`s because of you.....*Because of you, my life has changed Thank you for the love & the joy you bring Because of you, I feel no shame I`ll tell the world It`s because of you

Through it all . . .

by Hillsong United

You are forever in my life
You see me through the seasons
Cover me with Your hand
And lead me in Your
righteousness
And I look to You
And I wait on You
I'll sing to You
Lord
A hymn of Love
For Your faithfulness to me
I'm carried in
everlasting arms
You'll never let me go
Through it all
You are
forever in my life
You see me through the seasons
Cover me with Your
hand
And lead me in Your righteousness
And I look to You
And I wait
on You
I'll sing to You Lord
A hymn of Love
For Your faithfulness to
me
I'm carried in everlasting arms
You'll never let me go
I'll sing
to You Lord
A hymn of Love
For Your faithfulness to me
I'm carried
in everlasting arms
You'll never let me go
Through it all
Everlasting Father, I love You
Ever living Savior, I love You
Everlasting Father, I love You
Ever living Savior, I love You
I'll
sing to You Lord
A hymn of Love
For Your faithfulness to me
I'm
carried in everlasting arms
You'll never let me go
Through it
all

Worthy is the Lamb

by:hillsong

Thank you for the cross, Lord
Thank you for the price You paid
Bearing all my sin and shame
In love You came
And gave amazing grace
Thank you for this love, Lord
Thank you for the nail pierced hands
Washed me in Your cleansing flow
Now all I knowYour forgiveness and embrace
Worthy is the Lamb
Seated on the throne
Crown You now with many crowns
You reign victorious
High and lifted up
Jesus Son of God
The Darling of Heaven crucified
Worthy is the Lamb
Worthy is the Lamb

One Desire

by:hillsong

You gave it all for me
My soul desire, my everything
And all I am is devoted to You
How could I fail to see
You are the love that rescued me
And all I am is devoted to You
And oh, how could I not be moved
Lord here with You
So have Your way in me
Cause Lord, there is just one thing
That I will seek
This is my cry
My one desire
Is to be where You are, Lord
Now and forever
Its more than a song
My one desire
Is to be with You
Is to be with You, Jesus

Amazing Love

by: hillsong

I'm forgiven,because You were forsaken,I'm accepted, You were condemned,and I'm alive and well your spirit is within me,because You died and rose again.I'm forgiven,because You were forsaken,and I'm accepted, You were condemned,and I'm alive and well your spirit is within me,because You died and rose again.Amazing love,how can it be,that You my king would die for me?Amazing love,I know it's true,and it's my joy to honor You. Amazing love,how can it be,that You my king would die for me?Amazing love,I know its true,and it's my joy to honor You.In all I do I honor You.Im forgiven,because You were forsaken,and I'm accepted, You were condemned,and I'm alive and well your spirit is within me,because You died and rose again.Amazing love,how can it be,that You my king would die for me,Amazing love,I know it's true,and it's my joy to honor You.Amazing love,how can it be,that You my king would die for me?Amazing love,I know it's true,and it's my joy to honor You.In all I do I honor YouYou are my king,You are my king,Jesus You are my king,Jesus You are my king,Amazing love,how can it be,that You my king would die for me?Amazing love,I know it's true,and its my joy to honor You. Amazing love,how can it be,that You my king would die for me,Amazing love,I know it's true,and its my joy to honor YouIn all I do I honor You.In all I do I honor You .

Lord You are Beautiful

by: Rebecca St.james

Lord You're beautiful
Your face is all I seek
For when your eyes are on this child
Your grace abounds to me
Lord You're beautiful
Your face is all I seek
For when your eyes are on this child
Your grace abounds to me

I want to take Your word and shine it all around
First help me just to live it Lord
And when I'm doing well help me to never seek a crown
For my reward is giving glory to You
Lord please light the fireThat once burned bright and clear
Replace the lamp of my first loveThat burns with holy fear
I want to take Your word and shine it all around
First help me just to live it Lord
And when I'm doing well help me to never seek a crown
For my reward is giving glory to You

I can see your face now
I can feel your grace now
I can see your face now
I can feel your grace now
Its all I seek
Its all I seek

Lord You're beautiful
Your face is all I seek
For when your eyes are on this child
Your grace abounds to me
I can see your face now
I can feel your grace now
I can see your face now
I can feel your grace now

Quiet You With My LOve

by:rebecca st.james

Come to Me, all who are weary
And I will give you rest
Come to Me, all who are weary
And I will give you rest
Lay your head down on My shoulders
Be still my child, rest a while

I'll quiet you with My love
Rejoice over you with My song
I'll quiet you with My love
Rejoice over you with My song

Come to Me, all who are weary
And take My yoke upon you
Come to Me, all who are weary
My burden is easy and light
Lay your head down on My shoulders
Be still my child, rest a while

Wait For Me

by Rebecca St. James

Darling did you know that I, I dream about you,
Waiting for the look in your eyes when we meet for the first time
And Darling did you know that I, I pray about you,
Praying that you will hold on
Keep your loving eyes only for me

Chorus:
Because I am waiting for, praying for you, Darling
Wait for me too, wait for me as I wait for you
Because I am waiting for, praying for you, Darling
Wait for me too, wait for me as I wait for you
(Darling wait, Darling Wait)
Darling did you know I dream about life together
Knowing you will be forever.
I'll be yours and you'll be mine.
And Darling when I say, "till death do us part",
I'll mean it with all of my heart, now and always faithful to you

Bridge:
Now I know you may have made mistakes,
But there's forgiveness and a second chance.
So wait for me, Darling wait for me, wait for me, wait for me

Wait for me, Darling Wait
Because im waiting for you, Because im waiting for you
So wait for me, Darling wait
Wait for me